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Are you a rural woman who has felt stuck between wanting to be a supportive mum, wife, & farming partner, AND starting to do more for you?


You love your family and your farming business, but maybe sometimes you pause in the middle of your busy life and wonder: "Is this it? Is this all that I get to be and have and do?" You long to do more for you, but:

* You can't find the time or the energy or the support to fit it in around all your roles and responsibilities.

* You feel so selfish and greedy for wanting more when you already have so much to be grateful for!

* You feel too guilty to do anything for yourself, when you should be doing all the things on your long to-do list.

So you end up feeling angry and resentful of your family and farming business ... with no idea why, or how to change things!

If you're nodding along, then this is the book for you!

Loshni shares her story of going through this exact same struggle, in a deeply personal and relatable manner, that will leave you feeling seen, heard and acknowledged. You will learn:

1. That there are so many other women struggling with the same dilemma - you are not alone.

2. The 10 Signs of Struggle, and work out how many apply to you.

3. The critical First Step to doing more for yourself so that you can start thriving and make the most of your life ... while still being the loving mum, wife and farming partner you really want to be.

You will hear from other women about their struggle, and their practical tips to start doing more for yourself, without feeling guilty.

Loshni uses all she's learnt over a decade of conversations as a coach and facilitator to rural women, to put into words what rural women feel and experience ... but is seldom talked about.

This book is a must-read for all rural women (and men!) I was engrossed and drawn in to an emotional roller-coaster of hard-truths, and motivating inspiration. Loshni guides you through your experience so that: you feel supported; your space is held; and your value seen throughout. The shared voices of other rural women gave the book real-life context. Reading this is a gift to yourself and recommending this book is a gift to others. 

Becks Smith

Loshni’s story resonates with me as it’s me; my story. It is so common to lose yourself in trying to be the perfect rural woman … whatever that actually is?! Sharing her personal story, then working through how to take the steps towards finding ourselves again makes this a powerful, thought provoking read. Take the time to start the journey with Loshni’s guidance, it will be well worth it.

Sandra Matthews

Wow! This book is great to help you realise that you’re not the only one going through “stuff”. We all deserve to be happy and it's ok to put ourselves first. If we are happy, everything else will fall into place. This book helped me to just stop; just take small steps; not try to rush through to get to the end game/goal and then be disappointed. It's a journey we are on and we need to enjoy it.

Deborah Paterson

Reading this book is a journey of reflection. For me, there were parts that I was thinking “me, me, me” when asked if I had felt a particular way, or was frustrated with some things too. I like being able to first reflect, and then enjoyed reading the top tips in the concluding chapters and the ideas on steps to take. Life is about taking steps - there will always be parts you don’t like and don’t enjoy and it’s great to be reminded that moving these parts towards thriving is a conscious action that once done, benefits many around us too.

Trish Rankin



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About The Author:

Loshni was a city girl until she met, fell in love with, and married a Kiwi dairy-farming boy. She moved to New Zealand in 1998 and threw herself into her new rural life of motherhood and supporting Donald in his farming career - what a wonderful rollercoaster that has been!

But in 2010 she found herself in the painful position of feeling stuck between the joys of being a mum, wife and farming partner, and her growing resentment of her family and farming business ... because it left no space for her to be her and do more of the things that brought her joy.

So she embarked on an epic personal and professional development journey, training as a coach and facilitator supporting other rural women with their challenges and dreams. Her work in the industry was acknowledged in 2018 when she was awarded the title of NZ Dairy Woman of the Year.

In her first book she shares her journey, so that other rural women can see that they are not alone in their struggles; that there is nothing wrong with them for sometimes wanting more than their families and farming businesses and that they deserve to thrive! 

She is proud of being the mum to 3 sometimes-lovely kids; wife to a wonderful man; and doing her bit to support amazing rural women who are so often invisible superwomen!

I loved how intimate this book was! I felt like Loshni was speaking directly to me on every page. Our journeys as mums, wives, farming partners, and as individuals are far from simple. The juggle is real, the doubts are real, the guilt is real!!  Loshni encapsulates these feelings beautifully, and reinforces that it is okay to feel grateful for all that we have but to also desire more out of life. Go get yourself a coffee - and damn it, a piece of cake - and settle in for a bit of quality "you and Loshni" time. You’ll thank yourself for it. 

Karen Williams

It takes great courage and a deep passion for helping others, to open one’s life up to the world, be completely vulnerable and talk about the tough stuff, as Loshni Manikam has done in The Rural Woman Dilemma. At a time when change is sorely needed, this book will undoubtedly spark new conversations, ignite critical thinking, and contribute to a new way of being, not only for those who read it, but also for those they love and live for. This book should be read by all women on earth!

Marie Burke

So I have just finished the book in 24 hours! Couldn't really stop once I started. I put it at the top of my to do list - and it was so worth it.
I want to share it with all my farming friends - like leading them to water.

Linnet Burns

This book is brilliant! It was just what I needed to read and I will be reading it again!

It resonated with me so strongly. I experienced every emotion available to me, anger, resentment, sadness, frustration and joy and elation in knowing I am not alone.

Noeleen Bolger

This book is for every farming woman ever! Because we have all been in the trenches wondering "what is this life I've chosen?" Reading this helps us see that we are not the only one.

Pia Rockell

This book is an absolute game changer in the modern-day farming community. Society and women's farming roles have changed dramatically over the years, and we needed a book like yours to sit us back down, to ground us, and to get the conversations flowing.

Rachel Jackson

Click Here To Buy The eBook
Click here to buy the PAPERBACK

This book will help rural women feel seen, heard and acknowledged.



Discover the first steps to living the life you dream of living while still being the loving mum, wife and farming partner that you really want to be.